What Type of Selfish Are You?

Egoism isn’t exactly what most people think it is. In fact, there are at least two kinds of egoism: genuine and counterfeit.

What the crowd usually labels “egoism” and shames “egoists” for is really just a lingering stage-of-life fixation.

Put simply, it’s kid-level egoism, always aimed outward.

A child first wants milk, then a snack, later a game console, and on it goes. That’s normal childhood behavior.

The kid dreams of bending the whole world to his wishes and having everyone serve him. That childish fantasy is the birthplace of counterfeit egoism.

You might ask, Why call it counterfeit? After all, the person tries to be the center of the universe and hustles daily to make it happen—sounds like egoism.

Let’s dig deeper. Merriam-Webster defines egoism as “a doctrine that individual self-interest is the actual motive of all conscious action,” or more simply, “excessive concern for oneself.”

But even that doesn’t paint the full picture. What is “concern for oneself”? What counts as “personal interest”?

A grown-up who truly loves himself and has real personal interests understands that other people and their interests don’t automatically belong to him.

More than that, the outside world constantly demands attention = energy. And attention/energy is deeply personal—arguably more personal than the cash in your wallet.

It’s considered rude to ask someone to hand over their money outright. Yet if you refuse to pour attention into something that isn’t your business, you get tagged “selfish” and scolded.

That, however, is genuine egoism: valuing your own energy and not spraying it everywhere for every passerby.

True egoism is worth pursuing. Becoming a real egoist—someone who guards and directs his own life-force intentionally—should be your goal.